Well helloooo weekend! I am so glad it’s the weekend. For some reason this week seemed to drag on and on. The only thing on the agenda for tomorrow is shopping for maternity pants and I am super excited about that. I’m really not a fan of my belly band (it doesn’t hold my pants up very well) so it will be nice to hopefully get a pair of pants that fits. Then Sunday is football so we’ll be tailgating as usual and cheering on our Hawks.
It’s been 2 months now that I’ve been home with Little A full time. And I’m not going to lie, it feels like 6. I think partly because of the phase she’s been in with the whining and crying, but also because the days just feel so long. Like I look at the clock and think, “Are you kidding me?! It’s only 12:30!” That happened yesterday when I thought it was 2:30. I about cried.
So I thought I’d share a few things I’ve learned since becoming a stay at home mom.
1 // I am sooooo much more tired in the evenings. I mean seriously, I am way more tired now than I ever was coming home from my corporate job. I’d come home from work, throw my workout clothes on and either head for a run or into the garage to do a workout with baby girl. Now by the time K gets home I just want to lie on the floor in the fetal position and do NOTHING.
2 // There is a major adjustment period. Not just for me, but for the kiddo too. Little A was used to her nanny and the routine they had. Throw me in the mix and now all of a sudden I have my own routine I want to create and she isn’t having it and just wants to cuddle and suck her thumb on my lap and I’m over here all “No thanks, time to do some reading or at least for you to get off my lap for 10 seconds so I can pee.” And did I mention the attachment? She is so worried that I’m going to go back to work that she doesn’t want to be without me for 5 seconds. It’s exhausting (hence point #1 above).
3 // I’m not a creative person. I mean, I’m creative when it comes to adult things, but I’m not very crafty, I’m a horrendous artist (I mean, it’s real bad you guys) and I’ve come to learn that I don’t have the best imagination. Little A comes up with these elaborate stories and scenes and wants to play baby or pretend to be an animal and I just….don’t. I mean I’ll do it, but after 5 minutes I’m like “Let’s move onto the next activity.” The one thing I am good at is coloring, so we color and do stickers and activity books a lot. And go on walks and scavenger hunts. And read a lot of books. She’s already through the first 2 books of her reading series and reads them all by herself!
4 // I have less time that I did when I was working. Being home full time does not allow me the freedom to be on the computer when I want to or take 10 minutes to read a few blogs or finish that post I have drafted like I would do at work. I feel guilty when Little A is trying to engage with me and the computer is on my lap. So I just don’t have it on much. Therefore my online life (this blog in particular) has been a bit neglected. I’m trying to get into a better morning routine, but she’s also been waking up early and coming into bed with me so if I get up early that just means she gets up early and is getting less sleep. So I’ve been sleeping in. I’m hoping that we can get her back on track with her sleep and I’ll be able to get up a bit earlier to work on the blog and other things I need to do on the computer before she wakes up.
The one plus is that I do have a little more time to clean. And Little A enjoys doing it with me so that’s a bonus.
5 // Staying at home is way harder than I thought it would be. I knew it would be hard, but it is way harder than going to work. I’m sorry but it just is. I think it may have been easier if I’d been able to stay home with Little A right from the beginning. But having to start this stay at home mom gig now is tough. I still wouldn’t change anything and I do feel so lucky that I get to be home with her, but it ain’t easy. And I think that I am fully qualified to say that since I’ve been both a working mom and a now a full time mom. Being a SAHM is definitely harder.
But seeing her learn and grow and being the one to hear the funny things she says and does just reiterates our decision for me to be home with her.
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And that’s honestly all I have energy for right now; 5 things. I could probably go on and on about other learnings I’ve had but right now I just want to lay on the couch and not think for a few minutes before I crawl into bed and do it all over again tomorrow.
Have a great weekend friends!
Oh girl, I feel you. Being a stay at home mom is HARD WORK!
It’s been 2 months already?! I know I’m not in it, but I feel like it was just yesterday that you started. You’re doing a great job, friend! Your #3 – that’s a fear I have about parenting. I’m not creative and don’t come up with fun, creative activities to do with little kids. I’m afraid I’m going to bore them. Have a good weekend!
All your points make so much sense! I agree, it’s SO much harder to take care of a child than to sit at a desk all Day. SAHM do not get enough credit! Way to go! You are doing great
I stayed home with my daughter for the first 8 months of her life and it was SO hard… then I went back to work and life became harder in such a different way. We both have it hard though – no matter if you work or stay at home – Moms have the most difficult job of them all!
I just know it’s going to get easier. But yes, being a stay at home mom is hard. It’s mentally hard and exhausting. I remember when my kids were little and I’d be sitting on the floor trying to play blocks or something with them, and after so long, I’d feel my head start to drop, and it was all I could do to stay awake. It’s so true what they say… the days are long but the years are short. 🙂
Being a SAHM is no joke. My sister quit her job to do it and she works so much harder now!
Regardless, I’m happy you were able to make the decision that’s right for your family.
Thank you for your honesty! Being a stay at home mom is hard!! And yeah, you are busy all the time! I only do blog stuff on my computer during nap time or after the kids are bed for the exact same reasons you said! And sidenote, I’m not sure creative with crafts either haha!
Oh you poor soul. I can’t say I know how you feel, but I do hope that things will get better. Once you two find the best rhythm of things, it should probably get better. Also, it may be a lol harder since you are expecting so don’t knock yourself for being tired.
There is no job on earth harder than this. No job! We don’t get paid for it, there is no appreciation from the little hell raisers, tears come more often than we want to admit, tired, wait till number 2 arrives, you ain’t seen nothing yet (but don’t let that be a discouragement), Whining and crying together is worse than a boss berating you for something you did or didn’t do. I’d take that over anything. But, the flip side, your rewards come later and they are far better than you could ever have imagined. Hang in there! It will be worth it. Now rest up, tomorrow will be here soon enough. 🙂
Thanks Michelle. I’m already stressing about #2 coming. I just need to relax and enjoy my time with baby girl. She’s been really good lately and I want to savor these moments when it’s just us.
The whining is the worst. It can make you miserable over the course of a day. The thing about staying home is that they then feel that means you are available to play ALL DAY
I’ve been a stay at home mom for 22 years and homeschooling mom for 18 of those years.. it’s definitely hard. One of the main reasons is because you never leave your work. I mean, if you go to the office, you get to come home sometime, but as a SAHM your work is always with you. There’s always something to do… ALL the time. But even as hard as it is, I wouldn’t change it if I could. I cherish the time I’ve invested in my kids and know that I didn’t miss any of their growing up years. Let me tell you that even though it’s exhausting at times, if you stick with it, it does get easier. You’ll find a routine that works for your family and be able to hit a stride. And don’t worry about not feeling creative… if you have little ones, they don’t care about perfection… they just like the process. Anyone can make hand print turkeys, finger painting, splatter art, model magic “sculptures” or marshmallow and toothpick stick figures. And there are so many helps out there on the web that you don’t have to come up with original ideas. just jump in and have fun. Blessings on your family!
I was a working mom until my daughter was 3 and my son was 8 mo (They are now 5 and 2.5). Then I was a work from home mom doing daycare from that point until 2 mo ago when we brought home our 1 yr old daughter (we’re adopting). Honestly, I think the working from home was a great buffer. My kids knew I had work to do and I got into a routine of doing certain things at certain times each day because I HAD to or else daycare and being home and blogging just could not work. Now, having just my own kids at home for the past 2 months I realize that being solely a SAHM is hard. It’s difficult for me to keep the routine that I had, hard to divide myself between the kids, and I am SO TIRED at the end of everyday. Blogging often gets ignored. But, there is NO WAY I’d go back to work. Not a chance. And I hear you about the whining. My favorite things to do are pretend I can’t hear it, then respond in robot voice (“No you may not have a cookie. It is not in my programming.”) and if those tactics don’t work, putting said child in room so I don’t have to hear the whining and they can come out whenever they’ve decided to stop it! I also find my son’s seeming short term memory loss aggravating. “Can I watch a show?” “No, we’re going to Gramma’s” 2 min later. “I watch a show now?” “What!? No. We JUST talked about this…” I don’t know what to do for that yet.
Being a stay-at-home-mom is a lot of work! I remember actually thinking I would have more time for myself – HA! At least when you’re working, you get a lunch break and maybe even some coffee breaks to do your own thing.
It is fulfilling though and I wouldn’t trade the opportunity for anything.
Thanks for sharing Tiffany!
xoxo
I hear ya! I’ve been at home with Lil’ Ziggy since he was born, over 7 months ago. I can related to every single one of your points. My blog content production has certainly gone down because I don’t have much time to myself, and I’m exhausted by the time evening comes. Once Zig goes to sleep, I pretty much have enough mental fortitude to focus on a couple TV episodes before I hit the hay myself. But I know it’s the right thing for my family, I just keep reminding myself of that lol.
I read this the day you posted it because the title drew me in right away, and I loved your honesty so much! I haven’t worked since having my kids and I’ve felt so much shame that I’m not working as hard as my husband or that I’m not doing anything besides “staying home”, so it’s nice to hear someone who has done both give validation to what moms at home do. I know working moms probably have it hard in all other kinds of ways, but just reading this helped me feel like I’m not “lazy” being a SAHM.