I like to keep this blog as positive and happy as I can. It is my happy place after all. But lately things have been less than perfect. And I thought I’d share since I want to be real on here, and show that everything isn’t always lollipops and roses.
Have you ever had someone make you feel so inferior that you’ve lost all confidence in yourself? That is how I’m feeling these days. I’ve just 100%, completely lost all my confidence. I’ve let this person, for a year and a half, put me down, disrespect me and show little disregard for my feelings. And it has taken it’s tole. I HATE feeling like this. I hate that I’ve let this person do this to me. But I also hate that this person isn’t even aware of their actions.
I don’t want to let them continue to make me feel inferior. I want to rise above and realize that maybe they aren’t as confident as they come across, and so lashing out and putting others down makes them feel better about themselves. I don’t want to feel like I’m always second guessing myself and questioning my actions. I’ve done that enough in my life and as a 31 year old woman, I don’t need to do that anymore.
But knowing me, until I can change my situation (in this case, my job) I will probably continue to feel this way. I’m a creature of habit and old habits die hard.
Knowing that I have a hard time coming out of a funk once I’m in it, I am going to try to change my life outside of the frustrating situation I’m in. I’m going to focus on my family, my home, our future; and try to tell myself that this is just a moment in time and a growth experience. Adversity and hardship challenge you to grow, to learn, and to persevere. Many of the truly successful people you see or meet in life have a common story. They were challenged, the chips were down; the odds were against them. And they overcame.
I will encounter other people like this in my life at work, and outside of work. I will get through this.
Maybe I’ll pick up some self help books on tape or something. 🙂
What has helped you through hard times?
Tiffany, thank you so much for being honest! I truly admire being real in the blog world because too often it’s “lollipops and roses” and no one or anything is that perfect! I hate that you’re going through this 🙁 I know exactly how you feel and it’s not fun. I have a feeling that you are a lot like me and let what other people say affect you and get you down like this. Your quote by Eleanor Roosevelt is exactly right though. We really can’t change other people (their words, their actions, their attitudes) so we have to choose to not let it bother us. We can only control our reaction. That is SO much easier said than done and I can’t say that I’m good at that but it’s what I strive for. Remember that your identity is in Christ, not at work, not even at home. If we see ourselves as His child who looks only for His approval, those other people won’t have such a great hold on us. I’m speaking to myself here too! Praying for you, Tiffany! You are a wonderful person with a great heart!
Oh honey you are not alone! I have been letting someone in my life do this to me for the better part of five years. I know its hard but remember it is all about them and there issues not about you at all because you are amazing! If it gets too hard I have the name of a great doctor who can help.
Thanks Emily. It is really tough and I’m trying hard to get out of the situation, it just takes time. In the meantime they just continue to berate me and make me feel small which isn’t right.
I’ll let you know if I need that name. 🙂
I am so sorry to hear you are going through this. As you know, I had a trauma at my last job. I didn’t share fully on my blog but the tipping point was when a trusted colleague completely put me down and insulted me in front of my boss and other colleagues. I realized that my recovery from trauma would not get any better if I now felt emotionally vulnerable and unsafe at work. So I left. Initially I thought it would be a week or two to regain my stability before returning to work but it ended up I never went back.
I do know that God got me through. He gave me hope for a new future. He helped me recover and he provided a way out. In times like this I find that’s when we really need to lean into him. Even if we’re drained and it takes every bit of effort to pick up that Bible, He will refresh us.
I’m praying for you my friend and wish you much peace and comfort.
xoxo
So sorry.You will get through this because you are a strong women, even just for writing such a personal post.Love the quote. xoxo
Thanks Christine. I’m definitely trying to be optimistic and remember that this is just a moment in time and I won’t be in this situation forever. That definitely helps. 🙂
And yes, Eleanor Roosevelt had some amazing quotes.
I’m so sorry to hear you’re dealing with this! Especially if it’s a work person, it’s hard to escape it. Just remember that it’s not you, it’s this person. Obviously this person doesn’t like themself and has to make other people feel bad to feel better themself. I know it’s easier said than done, but try not to let this person have control over you. I hope it works out soon. ((Hugs))
Thanks Dawn. I’ve definitely come to terms with the fact that it’s this person (and it helps that others around me agree) and not me. It’s really hard when people are in authority roles and they don’t realize how their words and actions affect others.
Appreciate your words of encouragement! 🙂
It’s amazing how people no matter where they are have the same patterns! i met people like such all the time and though before they made my life unbearable now i just feel sorry for them needing to invest all this energy and time out of their precious life in making others miserable..such an unpleasant way to live life! thanks for sharing this honest post on blogger’s digest
You’re right. And sometimes they don’t even know their doing it. It’s so amazing to me that people feel ok with treating others this way.
Thanks for stopping by Marwa!
I don’t know how I missed this post. I am so sorry that someone is acting this way towards you and I hate that you have been torn down like that. You are such a caring, thoughtful person and you seem so positive, I can only imagine that this person has to have personal issues if they feel the need to treat you this way.
Have you seen the documentary “The Secret”? It’s on Netflix and Oprah talked about it on her show. I watched it for the first time two years ago and thought it was fascinating. I feel kind of lame saying this but it was a life changer for me after watching that and then reading further into the Law of Attraction. For the last two years, it’s all I’ve read about! So now you know my lame secret haha, but that’s what’s helped me 🙂